Regardless

Even how many times I heard about you,
You always seemed unmoved,
No matter what comes your way,
regardless,

what is there in a name they say,
what is there in me I say,
no matter what people say to or about me,
regardless,

when things are happening all around,
you would always act as if nothing happens,
life is that simple for you,
regardless,

I feel disappointed at some point,
is it all right for me to feel this way,
when things are not what I hoped for,

At the same time,
maybe it is better for me to be this way,
I will never know how I could carry on,
But I will take my chances,
As much as I am forced to,

The truth is,
I just don't know,
I'm confused,
what is what,
which is which,
should or should not,

So regardless,
your strong in a way,
resisting change,
sometimes your indifferent,
because you care less about others,
regardless,

I see myself in you sometimes,
but sometimes I really wanted to run away from you,
but then again,regardless

Lately, after some turn of events,
I felt crestfallen,
and you came along,

Fight along with me,
and hopefully you'll stay with me long enough,
regardless...

Instilling the Right Values

The title speaks for itself...we had progressed more than half way through Ramadhan...in fact...we just passed Nuzul Quran...

Lately, I have been exposed to some questions...about religion, faith, worldly and hereafter issues...some if not most I cannot answer or make a definite conclusion...and even at times...I feel very scared and afraid...to make the most accurate and correct judgement in a particular context...pertaining to my own faith and religion...the principles that I had embedded within for almost 18 years...

This is obviously because of the oblivious me...I don't have much knowledge to offer...which should be much sought after...May Allah Have Mercy On Me for all my sins...for my inability to uphold my responsibility...

In conclusion...I am just making a self reflection and contemplation to remind myself about Allah...how much I have to improve myself to become a better Muslim...a little bit of knowledge I had gain these few days...but it is indeed proven to bring a great change to my way of thinking...thank you for those who had given me support,guidance and many other things which are useful...as tools to succeed in life and hereafter...

Part Two

Speaking of which....the title I mean...a few slight updates from me...I decided to think of my transition period of assimilating to the college culture as a trial and tribulation and nothing else...I should be grateful for that too...so...I can less nag now....okay...

1) Rejected for Student Council selection...never mind I thought...maybe I wasn't really cut out for this...so...Allah knows best...

2)Went to several club AGMs...I am still thinking whether I should volunteer myself for Leaders club activities...I am worried that I may get a little bit busy...

3) Malaysian Studies assignments...were nevertheless daunting....I have to interview some high authorities for some scoop of the latest political hot issues...I had interviewed a member of DAP...now from BN...still pending...I have to make a call to him soon...yikes...

4)Raya is it...baju raya theme for this year is...kemeja...yes...i am totally digging into it now...but I'm still not done shopping yet...oh dear...had a couple of iftars lately...also recently or a week ago...me and my STARian friends go for buka puasa at Ayam Penyet...it was nice to relive that atmosphere once more...although not similar as it used to...but the effort and the means brought me to joy nevertheless...

5)This is a bit odd though...STARians is going to visit Taylor's University soon...I am not quite certain of the whole aim of the visit though...but I am requested to be there...so..I am not sure of what to say and how to help them in what way...

That is all from me for now...I am a bit busy resolving some issues...like my bad furhter maths result...salam...peace be upon you...persevere and advance during Ramadhan...

Alhamdulillah...

Alhamdulillah...is perhaps the most appropriate word to describe how I feel...I am grateful as some turn of events had enlighten me quite a bit...

A few days ago...I joined the intercollege debate tournament...I was not expecting at all to break into the quarter finals...even when everyone keep supporting and telling me that everything will turn out well...I was not very optimistic...

I just pray everything would be fine...with quite a shock...we did broke...we thought we had enough already anyway...proceeding to semis is unlikely...and in fact we were right...nevertheless...this experience was similar to some which I had earlier...and it feels rejuvenating to have the positivity kicked in and knocked me in the head again...self-realization and actualization it was...

I might just be getting the "used to the new place already" type of syndrome....to say the least...I was relieved a bit if I were to have the syndrome anyway...of course as people tell me to move on...even when I don't feel like to...I subconsciously did...it freed me and the rest...

However...that still never change the fact how I yearned and longed for the past...I would still be me...and I will try to accommodate everyone as best as I can...

I also noticed by now...some things about people around me...and me as well...There is a similarity about what people think about me back then and now...so..that is pretty much....ok I guess...now also we have this some degree of trust...

But I hope the smooth progress continues...insyaAllah..until then...

Tweaking-alert in Ramadhan

A lot of things need fixing....yes..its me...exactly....

It had been quite challenging as I predicted it was...college is extremely difficult as it should be...and sacrifices must further be made...

Not much sacrifice...but MORE frivolous moments actually...hanging on a cliff here...

Resolutions are made time and time again...I guess things wear out...status-quo degrades...maintenance comes into the picture...

Ramadhan would be a given for this task...and I have to make full use of it...however it is not like before...tarawih had not progress as it should...neither is other activities for that matter...

Astargfirullah...have mercy on me dear Allah...forgive me for all the things I've done and didn't do...I will try my best...