Tuesday, February 7, 2012

The drama of life

My parents always quote that my life is similar to a drama...is it because of the things that happened in my life?...but I guess everyone has their own drama right...

But yes,...if I were to reminisce and contemplate the things that happenned in my 19 years in this world...there were too many things that passed...even sometimes...the important ones...I seemed to forget...and I was washed away and drifted in the current of today's modern contemporary world...

There are so many things that were so memorable and once-in-a-lifetime experiences...that I could never repeat nor replace...

I reflected the times I used to aimed so high to be a state chess player...and Alhamdulillah...I went through the process...I was hanging by a thread and at the edge of the cliff from failing to achieve my dreams...I was ranked number 4...the last place to qualify...The nerve-wrecking, the-moment-of-truth moments...the clear distinction between success and failure...so close..yet so far...Of course nowadays...I have never once reached the first board of a tournament...I miss those moments...

Not to forget 2010's PPM...

All of these memories further reminds me how much I missed the teachers in STAR for their sacrifices...their guidances and helpfulness really carried me through...I wish I can see them more often...

Alhamdulillah again for these good times...although I might seemed to feel that I lost my touch...I am no longer the person that can achieve so much...I feel like my time has passed...I have become a failure...Maybe all of these feelings of mine is truth to all of these current developments...But also, maybe Allah had something better for me...or something that He planned for me...I am but to willingly submit to Him in any situation He wishes me be in. Everything good is from Allah...there is nothing to me...Everything that happens must be in His will and only to Him I seek help...

If I were to never return or go further...my plight shall go to Him...and the future forever rest in His hands...

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